I don’t generally like to post so much skin on social media; not because I am a prude but rather because I wish to use this outlet in better ways.

What looks like a very widely seen comparative picture is actually much more than that. Also yoga and anything to do with physical appearance, weight or comparison are not commonly associated or “supposed to be” associated.  However, we all know that the truth is different. We look at ourselves in the mirror, pinch and criticise what we see most times, tell ourselves we’ll do something about it and some of us then take action for a reason or another whilst others won’t, and that’s okay.  My blog is about what I did about it.

In the lower pics I weighed around 54.5 – 55kg.  I was practising mainly yoga and maybe a little bit of DIY cardio at home.  If you asked me back then, the idea of setting foot in a gym would not even remotely cross my mind.  I wasn’t actively practising as I would have wanted; it was an incredibly emotional year for me with my dad passing, a wedding to organise and a not so pleasant situation at work which caused me a lot of stress.

At the beginning of the following year (2017) I got pregnant and put on a couple of kilos.  Sadly, I miscarried but somehow the scales never went back to what had been my average weight for years.  I pushed myself to exercise more and maybe I just needed to release a build-up of emotions and hormonal change brought about from the miscarriage.  I wouldn’t say I had become a slave to the scale but not seeing that “55” on there, for someone who had always been active and healthy, was bugging me more than I would like to confess.  Pushing myself didn’t help either as my body was obviously going through some form of transition and my old back injury came back to bite me in the butt.

That is when I decided to join the gym and get a personal trainer.  I wanted to go back to my “normal” weight (I’m talking 2.5kg less here!) and not injure myself in the process.  It was tough going for the first months.  I started training by myself too as I felt really committed.  I was also doing a food diary for my PT, which I absolutely hated but soon understood its value. Meanwhile my relationship with the scale started shifting.  Though I couldn’t see the digits changing, I could see the difference in the mirror, in the progress pictures that I reluctantly started taking, in the way my yoga wear fitted me and even better how my yoga practice improved. These were all things that Luca had told me time and time again.  Coming from someone who has always gone to the gym and eaten healthy, you would think I would listen.  But I didn’t.  I had to hear it from someone else and experience it on my own.

I am not comparing myself to anyone who is struggling with being overweight and is on a mission to get fit and healthy.  I am completely aware that this was more of a personal discomfort and fine-tuning or “toning” so to speak of my body. The real challenge will come now that I am pregnant again and after the baby is born.  Health willing, I will accept it with the same commitment I had back in May when I started with my PT.

I never went back to weighing 54.5 (certainly not now that I am pregnant :-)!).  The lowest I hit was 55.7 (and that was probably after I sweat buckets at a hot yoga class) but at that point what the scale was saying did not bother me for a second because I felt fit and healthy – and I would like to highlight FOR MY STANDARDS, I am not comparing myself to anyone else!

The above pictures are a proof that it doesn’t matter what the scale says because I look skinnier and fitter and I am more tonned on those pictures where in fact I weighed more.  If you want to feel fit and loose fat (not weight!) you need to exercise, maybe challenge your usual fitness routine, drink more water, eat more protein and veggies; low fat and sugar free food is not going to cut it.  Oh and the most important thing: you have to have the RIGHT MINDSET.